From suffering to Compassion

A special thanks to The Moth and especially Phil Caputo.  I listen to The Moth almost everyday.  I intend to so for the foreseeable future.  This morning while I was working it was playing in the background.  I got caught up in Phil Caputo's story.  His struggle at the end "Why me? Why must I suffer?  to move from suffering to compassion." moved me.  I went for a run this morning and turned my radio off to contemplate this thing.  How has my suffering aided in the growth of my compassion?  How has it helped me?  How has it helped all sentient beings?
In typical Rover fashion, I wrote this paragraph a little more than a month ago and dropped it. In atypical fashion I have been going back and cleaning up my drafts.  I have always loved this paragraph because it reminds me of that morning.  It was a bright, cool morning in what has become on of my favorite places on earth, my park.  I began with thinking about myself.  The suffering that I had been experiencing was the only way for me to become introspective enough to feel compassion for myself.  I think that some of you call that grace.  I had to learn to forgive myself and to love myself unconditionally.  Once I had begun that I realized that it was imperative for me to push that love outside of myself to those that I come into contact with.  I began helping to care for the homeless, I tried to express a more unconditional and deeper love to my boys, I tried to express compassion to even those that I hated.  As I was running and contemplating all of this I began thinking beyond people.  How has my suffering helped all sentient beings, all of the earth?  I realized that it had.  I had been moving to a more vegetable based diet.  Of course if a thing is not being killed to into my belly that is certainly helping it, but also choosing less impactful foods helps us all.  I drive less personally. I can't help the mile I drive for work at the moment, but personally I only drive a few days a week.  I do the rest on foot or on my bike.
The reflection on all of this is one of those things that helped me move toward closure on this chapter of my life.  I feel as though I am in a new chapter right now.  I think that there will be flashbacks and slip ups, but I am turning the page and I feel good about it.
I wish you all happiness and I truly love you even if I have never met you